Just as I thought I’ve changed, it all came back at me.
I’ve been trying really hard to embrace the outgoing me and let it shine. I’ve done that to a certain extent in the past two weeks or so, but there’s that voice inside my head that never dies.
I’ve had fun. I’ve been happy. Very happy and entertained at times. For however long it lasted, I enjoyed myself. I am constantly being reminded of the fleeting nature of happiness. It’s really is temporary, isn’t it? The fear that happiness won’t last consumes me. It is very heartrending. I am troubled.
Nothing’s gonna last too; that’s just the way it is. Buddhism is right. Everything is fleeting, especially worldly happiness. Attachments make it worse. I am a sucker when it comes to attachments. Born that way. Shrugs. Can’t do anything with it unless I practice Buddhism more.
I’m still struggling with what to do.
Don’t you just wish you can make happiness last forever?
Welcome to fantasyland.
Please help me.