0156 – What touches me most

is not a hand nor a feet, but stories of inspiration.

I watched Freedom Writers today, as a part of my weekly Friday Night movie thingy at Brewster Academy. It was so so meaningful and inspiring. I say it’s the best movie I’ve ever watched. And you know, I usually don’t give movies nice reviews. This really is the best so far.

I think that stories about people rising up against oppression, people seeking freedom, people resolving and overcoming familial and societal conflicts touch me most fervently – especially ones about familial troubles. I don’t know why, but I find them very courageous and inspiring. I love them.

Sometimes I do love the way this summer program offers wonderful unprecedented experience to me. I’d probably never have heard of this movie if not for this program. The program, while boring and not very time-wise most of the time, does offer me things like attending a 4th of July parade in a small town, learning more about Japanese food, starting a 50 state quarters collection program. Though I’m not in the happiest state that I can be here – I face many personal and interpersonal problems which I am so weary and clueless of how to get rid of – many of my friends are extremely happy, and I like seeing that. I get to have fun here. I have crazy friends. I have photographs-loving friends. I have friends who play volleyball!

I’ve told myself that I can’t make every single minute of my life count. There’re useless and wasteful moments so that one can know when the meaningful and worthy moments arrive. I just can’t convince myself that yet, and that’s why it hurts my heart.

Ouch.

How hard is it for the right balance to be struck? Even if I found the balance that I want, will I be in a society whereby that balance will not put me in an antisocial or lonely position?

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